Luvtlee

This past week was a very busy, incredibly awesome week. Lets see…where to begin….

During church on April 6th our pastor talked about the fear of failure. Going largely from this verse: For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7 There were other verses but this is the one that stuck out the most to me and means the most to me. That is from the NKJ version. I also like the NIV version here: For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. Both of these versions are equally inspirational, are very powerful and little did I know, but I was meant to be there that day to listen to this sermon. He talked about fear being from Satan and it is what he uses to control and manipulate us. He told us how fear is the enemies faith. When we listen to our fears and let them dictate our actions we are placing our faith in satan.

I know all this to be true because I dealt with this last year when I was so heavy and going through the bulk of my weight loss. One of the reasons why I was so obese for so many years was my fear of failure. I was literally afraid to even try to lose the weight because I was afraid I would fail. Satan would berate me and tell me that I WAS NO GOOD and there was no point in me ever trying to lost weight and get healthy because it was my destiny to fail and look stupid. For some stupid reason, I listened and believed! Obviously I got over that and chose to not listen.

Looking back over my life though, there are many things I never did because I was letting fear control me. Now I had a new one come into focus in my life. My younger two boys have been going to karate for just over three years now and I’ve always wanted to try it out. My excuse was always that I was too fat. Well, that excuse has been gone for a long time now. Granted, I’ve still a ways to go with my weight loss but I AM healthy now and I AM in better shape then ever before. There is no reason why I couldn’t start taking karate lessons now too. I have been afraid to try it because I’ve been afraid to fail.

So all that next week I went back and forth in my head about whether or not I should take the bold step and tell Wendie when I was at the dojo that I was ready to get a gi and try out karate. I really wanted to do it and would feel excited about it but then it’d switch and say to myself that it was silly of me to even think of because there is no way I can do it. What about testing days where you gotta stand up in front of everyone by yourself and do things? That is a scary thought to me!

Anyway, I’m already at the dojo Monday thru Thursday nights 6:30-7:45 ish for my kickboxing classes. Also, my boys have their classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays, then there’s weapons class for the boys on Friday afternoons and I’m there then also, so that I can get in a walk/run outside during their class. There are even Saturday classes. So, believe me, I had plenty of opportunity to request a gi to get me started. I just was letting fear of failure beat me down.

Before kickboxing class Thursday I told myself that it was time, just do it already! So I did. After class I told Wendie I was ready and she gave me a gi. The following Tuesday, April 15th, was my first class. That was really appropriate in my opinion, because that was the 8 year anniversary of my dad’s death. I think it’s awesome that something good and healthy for me can begin on that day….and no, I didn’t plan it that way. But, it’s pretty darn cool that it did. I really had a good time, and I went back to class on Thursday and again on Saturday morning. I never get up early on Saturday mornings, I always sleep in until at least 10 am. But I got up at 7:00 so that I could make my 8:15 class. It’s been such fun that I think I might stick to it!

Super busy schedule now:

Mondays and Wednesdays: up at 6:30, get Noah to school at 7:20, at 7:30 walk .6 of a mile and then do 40 minutes of strength training on the gym in the garage, at 8:3o school work with my older two begins and goes until about 2:00-3:00 pm. Usually around noon each day we take a break for lunch and I get in a walk/run for 30 minutes. After school work is done I get in housework and cook dinner. We leave for kickboxing class at 6:15 and arrive home again at about 8:00. By then it’s time to get last minute things done with the kids, such as homework or whatever, before their bed time at 9:00. The older two and I chill out and watch some tv until 10:00-11:00 then it’s off to bed.

Tuesdays & Thursdays: the routine is identical until 5:00 when we take Noah to his karate class, when his class is over it is time for Nick’s karate class and then it’s time for Britney’s kickboxing class (used to be mine too). My karate class on these days goes from 7:00-7:45. We arrive home around 8:00 and the routine continues.

Friday: the routine is the same except we leave for the dojo at 4:45 because weapons class goes from 5:00-5:45. There is no karate class or kickboxing class for me on this day so I get in a walk/run around outside. Usually get in 2.4 miles, sometimes 3.0 in that time.

Saturdays aren’t quite so hectic. They now start out with my karate class from 8:15-9:00 am. The boys have sparring classes right after. Saturdays are the days I like to get in exercise by playing with the kids outside or skating in the school parking lot across the street. Sometimes ride my bike too. Also get in my strength training. Speaking of playing with the kids, this last Friday I actually climbed a tree with the boys! It wasn’t even hard, even though I hadn’t done so in about 25 years!!! That was so much fun!

Sundays are my “off days”, but they’re really kind of the same, I’m just a little more lax with things.

Well, I have a way of turning simple little stories into one heck of a long read! I hope that all who are reading this are doing well. May god richly bless you!

First I want to thank you all for your overwhelming support for my pictures of progression post!

Nothing new to report here really.  Just been going about our routine.  Slept in yesterday til about 10 am since my younger two boys were sick and I had them stay home from school.  It was nice being able to sleep in.  My daughter, she’s been sick with this cold for the whole week.  I don’t know what it is, but this cold has been going around our area for the past two months and everyone we know has come down with it twice.  It’s been really frustrating, but I think we’re near the end for our parts in it.  I’ve already been through it and this is my daughters second time also.  The boys haven’t gotten it as bad as us girls and I hope that they don’t now.  I sincerely hope that this cold is never coming back!  I’m tired of sickness running rampant around here.  I had it pretty much for throughout the last two weeks of February going through the first two weeks of March.  During that time I couldn’t workout because I was so tired all of the time.  Now that I’m back on track I want to stay there!

I miss my husband and the kids miss their dad.  We’re getting so tired of this lifestyle after nearly nineteen years of doing it.  It just wears on you.  I wish we could do the six month deployments like most other people, then it wouldn’t be so damn bad.  My youngest son Noah misses him the most out of the kids.  He’s only six and not as used to his dads deployments as the other kids are.  Although you’d think he would be because for the first three years of his life his dad was gone for the vast majority of the time.  Noah tells me he remembers that time though, and I believe him.  It might just be because Noah is a more emotional person than the other kids.  It’s not like he cries or anything, but he talks about his dad all the time and writes him letters, draws him pictures, things like that.  First thing he said to me yesterday when he woke up was that he always dreams of his dad coming home.  Oh, and the cutest thing, last Sunday when dad called home and I was talking to him on the phone, Noah was waiting by my side to see if it was his dad.  When I told him it was his dad, he clenched his fists, raised his arms and shouted “yeah!”.  It was cute!

Anyway, we miss him but it’s okay, we’re doing good!  We talk to him via phone every Sunday and I get an email from him each morning.  So, it’s not all bad!